From the top of the mountain that overlooks my Swiss chalet I can almost see Lake Geneva on a clear day, but thankfully, what I cannot see are the armies of so-called diplomats, flunkies, arms dealers, professional wallet lifters, con men, thieves, and men who have obviously been conceived by apes with a dose of the clap that go by the name of imams.  They are all here polluting the base of the Alps on the pretense of finding a peaceful solution to the Syria problem, as likely an event to take place as Portnoy renouncing masturbation.  It is a joke even to call it a peace process when Iran, the major power of the region, has been excluded but catamite so-called countries in the Persian Gulf are here in force.  An even bigger joke is the Saudi-Qatari demand of the right to withdraw the legitimacy of the Syrian regime in favor of the mercenaries the two petrodollar exporters of Wahabi terrorism are financing.  But as I write thousands of men are busy sitting at desks, translating texts, communicating with their governments back home, meeting nonstop with their own kind, and spewing out hateful rhetoric unheard of since the Nuremberg rallies.  Although I write this on the second day of Geneva II, as it’s called, if it succeeds and peace comes to Syria, I will walk barefoot up Everest wearing only a jockstrap and obviously die of frostbite in the process.

In all my years of following Middle Eastern politics, I have never seen a more ridiculous situation, where the weak and the cowardly but extremely rich—the Saudis and Qataris—have managed to upset the whole balance of power once the military genius of George W. Bush offered them the opportunity by doing away with one of the few strongmen of the region who had managed to keep sectarian violence to a minimum.  Everyone and his cousin who knew the difference between Iraq and Iran realized that once Saddam was gone the petrodollar pimps would flex their nonexistent military muscle.  What was not obvious was that the pimps would use proxies, like Al Qaeda.  The only man who stood in their way was Assad, and of course Iran was a problem, too, but that was quickly taken care of by our old friend Bibi Netanyahu, who for the hundredth time screamed wolf and got the Americans ready to nuke

So far, so bad.  After more than 100,000 dead and ten million displaced, Sunni Muslims from Libya, Tunisia, Saudi Arabia, and Turkey, using mercenaries and affiliates of Al Qaeda and other terrorist groups, are facing Shi’ites from Bahrain, Lebanon, and Iran fighting with the Syrian army loyal to Assad.  Needless to say I am 100 percent for Assad’s forces in view of his acceptance of Christianity and other religions, whereas the former will behead and crucify anyone not adhering to a strict Islamist agenda the moment power lands in their blood-dripping hands.  This is a post-American Middle East, with Israel momentarily set aside as the prime issue while the two sects punch it out.  Iran is a major player, but one who hasn’t formally invaded a foreign country since 480 b.c., when the Battle of Salamis turned sour for her.  Yet John Kerry, whose efforts to rein in the Israeli settlers on Palestinian lands I loudly applaud, demands that Assad step down as a prerequisite to a successful peace treaty, and also fails to invite Iran to attend Geneva.  This is where the joke comes in.  In fact it reminds me of a joke: A Jew and a Muslim are sitting next to each other on a flight.  The Muslim falls asleep, and the Jew pukes all over him during some turbulence.  Just before landing, as the Muslim wakes up and looks at the mess, the Jew says to him, “Feeling better?”  Just the money wasted in Geneva could rebuild Detroit in a year.  And in a classical style to boot.

So, what is the matter with these people?  Are they totally nuts?  No—just greedy.  Most of the press have been paid off by Qatar and the Saudis, as have many of the governments involved.  Erdogan the Turk is playing a double game, promising the Saudis that he will not stand in the way of a medieval Islamist caliphate run under a strict interpretation of sharia in Syria, while at the same time assuring the naive Americans and the weak and idiotic Europeans that he will be at the center of a democratic new Syria with his know-how.  The latest joke disinformation is that Uncle Sam and the Saudis, along with the treacherous Turks, are now in cahoots to help only the moderate rebels sponsored by Qatar—yet another great democracy—which reminds me again of that old joke about being a little bit pregnant.  The Islamists will devour any rebel group that doesn’t play ball with strict sharia rules, and everyone knows it, but it looks good on paper when U.S. aid starts to pour into Syrian rebel hands.

Let’s face it: We’re in a mess as long as we refuse to deal with Iran, an ancient country that could solve all the problems of the Middle East and rid us of that terrible plague that is Saudi Arabia.  Let’s start by telling Bibi to shut the hell up.   

 

[image from of www.telegraph.co.uk]